#not sure how to tag this. lol
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moistvonlipwig · 1 year ago
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Saw your Spike post and thought you really hit the nail on the head. Great observation!
In that post, you mentioned some bargain bin imitators, and I was wondering: which characters do you see as falling into that bucket?
hm so it's hard to produce a definitive listing because while i think bargain bin spikes are definitely a Thing, i haven't necessarily seen all the media in which they appear -- for instance, i've heard that both damon and klaus from the vampire diaries would probably qualify, but i never saw that show (and don't really want to lol).
and on the other hand there are lots of bad boy characters who...may or may not be actually trying to imitate spike. i think some bad boy characters are not very spike-like and thus we can safely say they are not bargain bin spikes -- kylo ren, for instance, is i think far too broody and self-serious of a character to be a bargain bin spike.
then you have ones that i would generally say fall under the 'bargain bin spike' umbrella, in that they are misogynist bad boy/comic relief characters who fall for the lead and thus (allegedly) change but unlike spike are romanticized and boring, but in a lot of these cases it's hard to say whether or not the writers were deliberately attempting to invoke spike with their characterization. a prime example of this type of character would be mon-el from supergirl (who is, incidentally, one of the worst characters ever put on television, and a massive disgrace to his perfectly likable counterpart from the comic books). therefore, while i would feel comfortable calling such characters bargain bin spikes, others might see the comparison as unfair.
however the character who actually inspired me to make that post is so quintessentially, undeniably a bargain bin spike that even if you like him it is impossible to argue (without looking like a very silly goose, anyway) that he is not a blatant attempt to ape spike's success. and that character is captain hook from once upon a time.
(to be clear -- there are two versions of captain hook in ouat, and i am talking about the one from s2-6, not the one from s7 commonly referred to as 'wish hook' on account of being from an alternate universe created by a wish a la the btvs wishverse episode. wish hook is my best friend and my silly rabbit and one of my favorite characters ever. and imo he is a far more successful character than his s2-6 counterpart largely because he is not a crude imitation of spike but rather a unique attempt to actually engage with the mythology of captain hook as a literary/folkloric character and figure in popular culture. ANYWAY when i refer to captain hook for the rest of this post just know that i am referring to the s2-6 version.)
if you haven't seen ouat, captain hook is a white dude with a british accent (his actor is irish and has an irish accent but specifically puts on a british one for the role) who wears eyeliner and calls people "luv" a lot and his signature look is a black leather duster with a red shirt underneath (yes, really). he starts off as a bad boy/villain character who is sometimes played for comic relief but has vague sexual tension with one of the protagonists, emma swan.
then in the third season he rather abruptly decides that he's in love with emma (why? who knows) and takes it upon himself to pursue her romantically, refusing to take no for an answer and hitting on her at some pretty inappropriate times and in some pretty gross and coercive ways, even sexually assaulting her at one point. unlike spike, he is not portrayed as creepy for this; at worst, he is portrayed as sort of comically out of touch, and often he is portrayed as sexy and romantic. he ends up in a romantic relationship with her and changes his wicked pirate ways to be good enough for her or what the fuck ever, who cares, it's all very unconvincing and played completely straight when it really shouldn't be.
if it weren't already obvious that he is ouat's answer to spike, there's also the fact that the showrunners were huge btvs fans and often took inspiration from that show's storylines -- the wishverse is one example, but they also do an eyeroll-worthy homage to buffy killing angel, a musical episode where the characters are self-aware, et cetera. so why did captain hook fail (in my opinion -- in the court of public opinion, he's quite popular) when spike succeeded? well, for the reasons i laid out in my earlier post -- the showrunners wrote hook the way they did because they all liked spike and wanted hook to be like spike. there was no one in the writers' room (or no one with power, anyway) to push back against the romanticization of the character or to challenge the audience to think about him differently. it's like if the btvs writers' room had only jane espenson, but no david fury or joss whedon or any of the other, more spike-critical writers.
and uh. when i say it's like if the btvs writers' room had espenson but not fury or whedon, what i really mean is:
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yeah.
a final note: i think one of the few examples of the spike archetype being done well by a show that isn't btvs is nathaniel plimpton from crazy ex-girlfriend -- a character who is a deliberate parody of bad boys who turn good for the love of a woman. he has failings as a character too, but they're much more akin to spike's own failings as a character, e.g. hogging too much screentime and narrative importance in a show that's supposed to be about women. he is certainly not portrayed as an aspirational love interest or hero. i think it says something that the best imitation-spike is the one that's making fun of him, not trying to be him.
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areyouscaredyet · 8 months ago
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im not particularly religious but i think it’s very cute that Trans Day of Visibility and Easter are on the same day this year :)
its no question that something like this could be triggering or upsetting to a number of queer ppl given the current sociopolitical climate, so i want everyone to remember that u are loved! Regardless of what u or others believe, there are ppl who will love and support you always. Give yourself patience and treat yourself with care!!!
happy and peaceful TDOV everyone!! And Easter to those who celebrate :D
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turtleblogatlast · 5 months ago
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Leo learns something about himself 🏳️‍⚧️
Based roughly on this old post.
Bonus:
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[Leo is taking the fact that he was born biologically female simultaneously very well and also not so well but overall he’s mostly coping with the fact that it was Draxum that just essentially gave him the turtle equivalent of ‘The Talk’.]
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#trans leonardo#trans leo#rottmnt headcanons#turtle art tag#rise draxum#happy pride everyone~#if you’re wondering why there’s no backgrounds that’s because my files got messed up so just blankness in the bg sorry#but yeah!#this is forever and always my fav headcanon for Leo it makes too much sense to me#I wanted to make sure I got it done in time for pride haha#I don’t know if it’s obvious by the end but Draxum ran off because he was for once doing something nice for Leo#that being leading him somewhere else not in front of everyone so Leo can process the fact that he was born female in peace haha#(but he also just - wanted to avoid the ensuing awkward Talk as long as he could lol)#“how would Leo NOT know’’ he had an inkling but never thought much of it because he’s a teenage turtle mutant with no access to healthcare#also yeah that’s splinter’s hand at the end there I just KNOW he’d want those pics#also also - Leo here can technically be trans or even intersex in some way too#both is good#making this made me remember why I never do color#at least for comics#it just takes sooo long#but it was fun and worth it for my fave hc#this is like the first time I’ve drawn Draxum and man he’s kinda hard to draw#also their sizes are just 1 2 and 3 because Draxum had a simple system in place for sizing his subjects#(aka I was too lazy to think of anything else to put there)#also dunno if anyone noticed but look at Raph’s paper and look at his baby’s self’s photo
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oh-gh0st · 11 months ago
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i heart these rivals so much. maybe they'll kill each other. maybe they'll kiss. maybe they'll make ou
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aslitheryprinx · 4 months ago
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anatomical-puppet · 10 months ago
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my source is that i am autistic about horror
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periwinklemoonlight · 5 months ago
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let's groove tonight!
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bunnieswithknives · 16 days ago
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Wow Dale I didn't know you liked entomology! 💕
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striveattemptfail · 1 year ago
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had a conversation about my adhd recently then went to make this lmao
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faglaios · 2 years ago
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one detail I really liked that I haven’t seen anyone touch on is how death only ever showed up when puss was close to potentially dying, which lead me to realize puss was probably going to drink himself to death at their first meeting
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sonlc · 6 months ago
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any tips on how to draw the sonic style muzzles? I've been struggling for decades and it still doesn't look right and glued on
hi i feel you so bad. its been almost a year since i started learning how to draw sonic characters and the muzzles are honestly one of the things i still struggle with the most (in fact i was kinda shocked when i got this ask because i dont feel completely qualified to give other people advice on this, haha). that being said heres my attempt to show my process/thoughts i have when drawing them in hopes it'll help you out. <3
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danieyells · 4 months ago
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Tokyo Debunker Stigmas, Artifacts, And Other Possibly Combat Relevant Information
Since we've met all of our current ghouls, I decided to share my non-comprehensive list of the stigmas and powers and weapons of the ghouls we've seen so far!! This isn't all of them because they haven't all been revealed or explained. But it should be everything we've seen so far! Let me know if/where I've missed things! I've also mentioned some other details for some of them, namely the less human ghouls.
Jin Kamurai
Stigma
Incantation - Bianerus
Effect - forces the target to obey his command.
Currently cannot be activated without the PC's enhancement. At present, only Tohma, the PC, and few if any others know this.
Incantation can be recited mentally
Continuous commands("kneel") only seem to last a few minutes at most
Artifact
Sword - teleportation
Can be used to cut a portal into the air for teleporting someone with him, but doesn't appear to need this for just teleporting Jin
Tohma Ishibashi
Stigma
Incantation - Argeas
Effect - "lets him send vibrations long distances"
Vibrations include the vibrations from his voice, allowing his voice to carry longer distances, making him heard further away
When enhanced he can break through anomalous soundproofing and better specify the direction his vibrations carry(as neither Kaito nor Luca heard his voice from outside the room)
Artifact
Halberd - ?
Other
Tohma naturally has "brute strength" which, combined with his stigma, allows him to essentially make earthquakes.
Lucas Errant
Stigma
Incantation - Iggnaim
Effect - creates a barrier.
When enhanced the barrier becomes visible. It's significantly larger and supported by a large anomaly that's invisible to everyone but the PC and perhaps Kaito, even unable to be seen on cameras or by Luca himself.
Artifact
Twin blades - ?
Appear identical aside from a difference in color.
Smashed through reenforced glass to choose him as their new master.
Apparently sound to Luca like a crying child. He believes the child must be begging for his help.
Other
Carries around a knife.
Kaito Fuji
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - "can see auras sometimes?"
So far hasn't been seen/used, and Hyde didn't sound certain about what it does.
Kaito has notably enhanced vision, able to see things that are further away and surprisingly skilled at reading lips.
Kaito screams when Luca's stigma is enhanced, looking straight up at the anomaly it spawned despite no one else but the PC appearing to see it. While it's possible he only saw its aura, it's likely he saw the anomaly itself.
Artifact
Rogue bow - ?
Veers nonsensically off path when shot, except, seemingly, if Kaito truly wishes to hit the target(?)
Alan Mido
Stigma
Incantation - Yagsal Olbalsa
Effect - super strength.
Artifact
Lead pipe - ?
Leo Kurosagi
Stigma
Incantation - Haxs
Effect - super hearing.
Increases distance and precision of his hearing. Does not allow him to hear through anomalous soundproofing.
When enhanced increases distance further and allows him to hear through anomalous soundproofing.
Artifact
Bubble gum - can be manipulated into any shape when blown.
The longer it's chewed, the longer he can manipulate it
Shohei Haizono
"So if I chewed this one a bunch and stuck it over your nose and mouth...
"...you'd suffocate. Bye bye Honor Roll."
suggests that it can't be removed until the time he's manipulated it runs out?
Stigma
Incantation - Spurno
Effect - forces change in direction.
When enhanced the change in direction is more forceful, like a knockback effect.
Artifact
Motorcycle - ?
Her name is Bonnie. She eats food placed in her fuel tank instead of gasoline, including chewing it and even burping. She's picky about what she eats. Her favorite food is barbecue sandwiches, but she also eats jerky.
Sho drives her just about everywhere.
Haru Sagara
Stigma
Incantation - Bahnti
Effect - reduces gravity's effects on his own body.
Reduced effect of gravity allows him to move extremely fast.
Makes his body much more fragile when used. Possibly includes weakening his immune system?
Artifact
Deck brush - ?
Towa Otonashi
Stigma
Incantation - ? (has an audio file, but the spelling hasn't been shown.)
Effect - Controls weather?
Towa exhibits control over weather as his primary ability, however because it's not shown to be in response to his incantation it's somewhat dubious as to whether or not it's actually his stigma.
Others' understanding of Towa's stigma is only that he controls lightning and that other weather patterns are random, not in response to Towa's feelings.
The weather reacts to Towa's emotions, causing the sky to darken in preparation of rain, lightning, or snowstorms when he's angry.
When Towa was away from Jabberwock for a day the nature conditions deteriorated significantly, with water drying up and the sky dark despite it being sunny the previous day. This may be coincidental, as Darkwick's weather is said to be unpredictable.
Towa is also able to predict weather that he doesn't control.
Towa can create lightning(which he uses to electrocute enemies), rain, wind(used to create a pillar of water for the PC to land on when falling off the boat and to direct the rain sideways to wash bubble soap off of Kaito), snow, and possibly earthquakes(the ground is noted to start shaking in response to his anger.)
His lightning may be able to be used under water without being conducted into non-targets, however it's also possible he used harsh winds instead of lightning when destroying Otohime and her minions.
Artifact
Bubble wand - blown bubbles cause explosions.
The explosions are powerful enough to destroy glass that withheld a full grown Kraken.
Towa warns not to touch the bubbles, as they will kill you.
Other
Towa cannot speak during the daytime and is only able to talk when it's night. This includes being in Obscuary, where it's permanently night, however the cover of clouds doesn't allow him to speak during the day meaning it's not related specifically to the visibility of the sun.
Can speak to and understand anomalies, even those that lack speech capabilities(such as the tree on the hill.) Haru is aware of this.
Able to see and hear ghosts(Zenji) and possibly other things that only people who are "special" can see(the tree on the hill.)
Can jump so high he can essentially fly, although this may be related to control of wind(though there's no notation that the wind blows when he jumps.)
Anomalies fear him and obey him, particularly when he's angry, even to the point of kneeling out of fear when he's furious.
Ren Shiranami
Stigma
Incantation - Raothtas
Effect - Cleans things?
Has only been used to remove Calamari's ink from the floor when wiping it up failed.
Artifact
Swim ring - restrains target.
Cannot be removed by the wearer.
Has a rope attached that allows the wearer to be reeled in.
Taiga Hoshibami
Stigma
Incantation - Malab
Effect - ?
Artifact
Tommy gun - takes anything broken into small enough pieces and fired from it as ammo.
Other
Damage type seems to vary based on what was placed into it. Shards of glass created a swirl of glass shards, whereas bronze from a statue shot heavier rounds.
Doesn't seem to require ammo to fire.
Doesn't seem to work on everything as Taiga says his bullets don't work on anything lately. Possibly limited to hostile entities? (He was able to shoot the Oblivion Dealer, but not able to shoot the Kyklos--which ran away--or the Barong--which was non-threatening.)
Carries a knife and a pistol.
Romeo Scorpus Lucci
Stigma
Incantation - Tiris
Effect - "turns things into bombs".
Able to turn anything into a bomb, including non-explosive objects.
The size of the blast depends on how attached to the target object its owner is. If Romeo truly values something he's blowing up, the explosion is quite destructive.
Hyde has him testing various types of prototype anomalous explosive materials for Darkwick on missions.
Artifact
"To me, these prototypes are a path to catching anomalies in one piece." which implies most of Hyde's prototypes cause non-lethal explosions.
Sniper rifle - ?
Maintains his bullets himself.
Doesn't always carry the same types of rounds. For example, he only had smoke bombs in the prologue.
Ritsu Shinjo
Stigma
Incantation - Acimo
Effect - hardens his body. Increases his weight.
Artifact
Prevents damage from concussive attacks such as kicks and bullets. If you kick him while it's active it'll hurt.
Doesn't seem to experience pain in this state.
Can survive explosions and escape from collapsed buildings unharmed.
Compendium of Laws - ?
Subaru Kagami
Has the contents memorized?
Taiga taught him to use it as a blunt weapon.
Stigma
Incantation - Talnandio
Effects - psychometry.
Experiences memory fragments through almost anything he touches.
Passive, activates on contact with people, animals, anomalies, and objects without incantation.
Using it exhausts him to the point of needing a significant amount of rest, possibly even passing out shortly after usage.
Wears gloves and avoids crowded places to try and avoid accidentally setting it off. Feels bad about being able to learn people's secrets.
Artifact
Parasol - ?
Sturdy enough to destroy a possessed doll.
Haku Kusanagi
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - ?
Implied he prefers not using it?
Artifact
Flute - ?
Used flute to remove himself and the PC from Kisaragi Station, knocking them out with some sort of ethereal water and causing them to wake up back on the empty train car.
Other
Able to see and communicate with spirits.
Able to perform various rituals such as laying spirits to rest and making talismans that allow people close to a spirit to see and hear them.
"Cordoned off the area" of the train and station the PC was on, which should have prevented interference from civilians. May be part of his Artifact or Stigma, or part of his capabilities as a Shinto priest.
Zenji Kotodama (Taro Kirisaki)
Performs the stigma test for Darkwick.
According to Taiga he's able to remove curses if the anomaly that caused the curse is in front of him. It's uncertain if this is his stigma, part of his artifact, or another power.
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - ?
Artifact
Doll - ?
Heavily resembles Jiro as a child, according to Zenji.
Won't let anyone but Zenji touch it. Protects Zenji.
Appearance slightly changes to that of an oni when angered.
Has a mind of its own. Wanders around campus without Zenji, much to his concern.
Able to damage and destroy ghosts.
Other
As a ghost, Zenji cannot be touched, meaning he can't be damaged or killed. However he covers his ears when Haku performs a ritual to lay spirits to rest and covers his face in Subaru's warding card with incense, suggesting that he would be laid to rest under the right circumstances.
Darkwick is unaware Jiro is present as only Haku and Towa(and eventually Subaru and the PC) are aware Zenji's spirit lingers. If Darkwick were to become aware of Zenji's presence they would want him laid to rest.
Due to Obon, people in Japan are more sensitive to spirits and anomalies are more frequent, causing Zenji to sometimes be visible during the summer.
Zenji brings his doll with him most everywhere, however people can only see the doll and not him. The same happens with his biwa. If he carries them, they appear to float. In the summer people in Japan are more sensitive to spirits(due to Obon) and may see or hear Zenji when they wouldn't otherwise.
Zenji can touch physical objects(his doll, his biwa, and his phone) and his footsteps are audible if he doesn't silence them.
Afraid of ghosts, possibly the dark, and maybe dead bodies.
Edward Hart
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - ?
Artifact
Cane? - ?
While his profile lists his Special Artifact as "??", he holds a cane in his combat chibi.
Other
Edward is, or was historically, the world's strongest vampire, implying a great deal of hidden power. As he is 400+ years old, he knows a great deal about anomalies that Darkwick doesn't listen to for some reason. However being old has also made his body and mind much weaker. . .allegedly.
Ed has immense power, which we've only heard of him using on the singular mission he participated in. Using it he obliterated an anomaly and a building in such a way that Darkwick struggled to cover up(unlike Tohma's destruction which was able to be explained as poor maintenance and age) suggesting he more or less vaporized it. It's unknown if this is a vampire power or his stigma.
Ed is able to transform into a bat and fly around. He doesn't seem to be able to speak in this form, only screeching loudly.
If Rui touches him, the touched part will break off(at which point it can be reattached simply by pushing it back into place,) ache intensely for a time, or he will die temporarily. However Ed is immortal and cannot die by normal means. He doesn't need to breathe and cannot be suffocated, for example.
As a vampire, Ed is rapidly exhausted by sunlight. Sunlight won't kill him instantly, but it will cause him to collapse. He claims sunlight will turn him to ash eventually, and he cannot be outside in the sun without a parasol. If it's cloudy enough, Ed is able to be outside during the day. He's usually tired during the daytime, but still seems to sleep during the night.
Ed is physically and mentally weaker during summer months, but stronger during autumn and winter.
Ed primarily drinks tears, although he mentions that he does drink blood in his character story and on the home screen. He finds that human food doesn't taste like much of anything.
Ed mentions that Lyca's soul is misshapen, however it's unclear if he can actually see his soul or if he was merely teasing him.
Rui Mizuki
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - temporary relief of pain and discomfort
Incantation has only been said in his head.
It's unclear if blowing a kiss is required to activate it or if that's just for flair.
Artifact
Scythe - allows Rui to conceal himself in darkness.
Rui admits to using his artifact to keep an eye on others on campus.
Other
Suffers from a 'Reaper Curse' which effectively makes him a reaper.
Cannot make skin contact with living things without them dying. This includes humans, animals, plants, and even mold!
Wears gloves, a turtleneck, and avoids crowded places to avoid committing manslaughter.
Absorbs the life energy of what he touches and kills. This kills almost anything instantly as most things are too weak to survive it. Absorbed energy goes straight to his body, preventing him from sleeping. He keeps himself as busy as possible as a result of having so much energy to spare.
Lyca Colt
Stigma
Incantation - Ramsochisa
Effect - allows him to follow any scent he's smelled before.
Artifact
Claws - ?
Other
Werewolf. Transforms with exposure to the full moon. "The speed of his transformation is affected by how much he's exposed to moonlight and his mental state." Sometimes feels his skin crawling when the full moon is near?
Covering his head when he's outside under the full moon prevents or regresses his transformation. Collapses after his transformation regresses from half wolf and doesn't transform while unconscious. Nothing happens to him if he's not exposed to the full moon on a full moon night. Obscuary is always a crescent moon, allowing him to be there safely during a full moon.
Werewolves have four stages: Human, partial wolf, half wolf, and full wolf. At 'half wolf' Lyca is an anthropomorphic wolf. However, he loses control of himself after he's been transformed for a while, and may attack indiscriminately.
He doesn't remember much when he transforms. He might remember less if he fully transforms?
Yuri Isami
Stigma
Incantation - Agnihaet
Effect - "hyperstimulates his braincells"
"allows him to logically process information and solve complex equations almost instantaneously."
when enhanced seemed to make the information processing instantaneous and extremely accurate?
Artifact
Syringe - Causes injuries received by the individual injected with its contents to damage the entity that inflicted them.
Jiro Kirisaki
Stigma
Incantation - ?
Effect - ?
Artifact
Chainsaw - ?
According to his Christmas home screen dialogue where he cut down a fir tree for Yuri, the chainsaw doesn't cut well. However in the chapter it seems to have no problem cutting through flesh. Perhaps it cuts through anomalies or flesh, but not other things?
Other
Jiro is noted to be especially strong.
Jiro was in a coma until an undisclosed time ago, when Yuri was able to awaken him from it. When he was comatose and for how long and why hasn't been relayed yet, however he was said to be particularly violent during The Clash, meaning he was likely awakened before or during it.
As a side effect of his condition and mysterious illness, Jiro has a poor memory, immunodeficiency, and his wounds reopen very easily. He needs four treatments a day, and they take around an hour to complete. Yuri is the only one who can administer them, and Jiro isn't able to do so himself. Even with his treatments he's forgetful and prone to being sick and has a bit of a fragile constitution. Abrupt changes in temperature, for example, make him choke.
Jiro doesn't react much to his wounds and being in pain, but he will eventually collapse from overexertion or illness if he misses a treatment or has taken too much damage.
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crunchchute · 5 months ago
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my attempt at a bunch of my fav artists styles :] idea by sootnuki!!
i would love to do more but this was already a huge challenge
if any artist here dislikes this/is uncomfortable with it/any reason i can take it down or turn off reblogs etc. otherwise i hope its ok 🫡 im not gonna tag anyone just gonna let it do its thing in the wild lol
#crunchchute art#my art#sam and max#sam & max#i hope it will be viewable as i dont know how much tumblr will crunch it#in any case i have it up on twitter also and it seems to be in good quality there#it looks like a 'the 7 human souls:' meme hfhdhf#hey i can put more thoughts in the tags right? so first i didnt really put enough effort into my own one and i kinda realized my style#is kinda mid ngl. cause im lazy + this coloring style might not really fit them. anyway.#for sootnukis style i adore the rendering of the clothing folds and stuff but i couldnt get it just right it remains a mystery to me#silcrow i tried to do a traditional drawing but kinda messed up some of the coloring especially on the pants#also couldnt figure out if its just markers or markers + pencils or what. so i kinda did my own take of 90% markers 10% pencils#mtsodie i love the color palettes and the shapes so that was a lot of fun to try; i like the outcome#narnour i absolutely love the tiny little eyes and how goofy and round they look so that was fun to try to replicate too#as well as the colors which i mostly color picked cause i couldnt get a red overlay right#zembo was a nice way to revisit a chalky brush that i havent used in ages not sure if i got it right though#applettoast i feel like theres some gorillaz influence or its at least something i used while coloring. as you might know i used to draw#gorillaz a lot and tried to replicate the coloring etc. and i think it fit here. correct me if im wrong lol#snuckeys was also hella fun cause i love the cartooniness and the details like the teeth showing gums and stuff. hope i did it justice#also the eyes! i love the big highlight and that the eyes are brown its cute#it was nice to branch out for a bit
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senipsenipsenip · 13 days ago
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The Pines family sat at the table, quietly eating their breakfast, when Mabel slammed her hands on the table and shouted “KERMIT THE FROG”.
Dipper leapt forward to right his orange juice glass, gathering nearby napkins to sop up the puddle. “What?”
“Kermit the frog! He plays the banjo!”
“Yyyyes?”
Ford raised his hand. “Who’s Kermit the Frog?”
Stan snapped his head up from his plate. “Who’s Kermit the Frog? The Muppets, Pointdexter, you were around for The Muppet Show. They had a movie and everything.”
Ford frowned. “Muppets.”
“Yeah, they’re a riot! There’s this Bear whose got some great puns and this pig who really know how to throw a punch. You’d love it, they’ve even got a scientist!”
Ford raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t realize you were such a fan of children’s television.”
“Children?!”
Dipper stirred his cereal. “I’m just impressed you remember all that. Yesterday you forgot you were married.”
“That’s because The Muppets are forever!” Mabel exclaimed.
“Wait, Stanley you were married?”
“Yep. Actually, unless I’m forgetting a divorce, I might still be married.”
“You didn’t,” Mabel chirped. “I’d have it on my Romance Chart if you did. You’ve missed a lot of anniversaries.”
“So has he!” Stan argued. “I’m not the only bad husband here!”
Ford spluttered. “Husband?”
Dipper frowned. “I think we’re getting a little too far away from why Mabel screamed Kermit the Frog and knocked my orange juice over.”
Mabel nodded. “Right, so, I was thinking of Mr. McGucket -
“Stanley you have a husband?“
“I was thinking of Mr. McGucket,” Mabel interrupted. “And how he could maybe help around the Shack. And he plays banjo! He could play banjo and people could put money in his lil banjo case like a real musician.”
At the mention of money, Stan leaned forward.
“But like, no one knows banjo music,” Mabel continued. “So I was like, maybe pop hits banjo? But then BOOM! Kermit the Frog! People love that frog. He could play the rainbow song. He’d be a hit!”
“Interesting,” Stan muttered. “Preying on people’s nostalgia to milk them for cash. I love it!”
Ford hummed. “Actually, that’s not a bad idea, Mabel. Activities like playing musical instruments have been proven to help patients with Alzheimers and dementia. Not that Fiddleford’s condition has the same root cause, but it may prove beneficial to memory recovery.”
“Eugh, don’t ruin this for me.”
“If playing an instrument helps with memory loss, maybe Grunkle Stan should learn an instrument,” Dipper suggested.
“Ooo!” Mabel squealed. “What about guitar? Or the piano? OH!” She clutched Stan’s arm with a fervor. “The triangle!”
Ford grimaced. “Maybe not that one.”
“Sorry, kid. I’m not exactly a music guy,” Stan shrugged out of Mabel’s grasp. “Let’s leave that to the professionals.”
Mabel frowned, but let the topic go.
Ford stood from the table. “Well, I happen to be visiting Fiddleford this afternoon. I can broach the topic and see what he thinks.”
Fiddleford, as it turns out, loved the idea. To the surprise of everyone, Fiddleford admitted that he had always wanted to play in a jugband when he was younger, but could never get over his stage fright enough to audition for the local band. Then he went off to college and then…everything else.
“Maybe I zapped away that scared bit enough to play!” he had cackled, knocking at the side of his head with his knuckles.
It was settled. “Fiddlin’ Fridays at the Mystery Shack with Fiddleford McGucket”. Dipper tried to point out the title didn’t make sense since it was a banjo, not a fiddle. Stan argued that “customers are suckers for alliteration”. The set up was just Fiddleford dragging an old rocking chair onto the porch and opening up his banjo case. Mabel had made a large glittery banner, but it was quickly absconded by Fiddleford’s raccoon.
“Tell your wife to give me back my banner!” Mabel had yelled, chasing the raccoon into the bushes.
“Ex-wife,” Fiddleford sighed sadly. “Apparently I was too emotionally available.”
Ford pulled at his hair. “Did everyone get married without telling me?”
“Excuse me?” A voice piped up. Fiddleford and Ford turned to see a little boy standing at the bottom of the porch. He was dressed in hiking clothes that were obviously new. In the distance, a young woman was unstrapping a baby from its seat in an SUV. Obviously city folk coming to the “wilderness” for the first time.
“Are you a real hillbilly?” The boy asked. Suddenly the door slammed open, Mr. Mystery striding through, eyepatch in place.
“Sure is!” Stan grinned. “Our very own genuine hillbilly just waiting to play you a tune! All you gotta do is put some of your mom’s money in his case there.”
The little boy’s eyes widened, turning around to race towards his mother.
“Stanley,” Ford admonished. “Fiddleford isn’t some show monkey to throw money at.”
“During work hours he is.” Stan turned to Fiddleford. “So, did Mabel teach you that song she was so excited about?”
Fiddleford sat frozen, watching the little boy yank at his mothers pants to try and get her attention, the baby beginning to fuss.
“Well…” Fiddleford cleared his throat. “Some good news and bad news fellas.”
Ford furrowed his brows. “What is it?”
“Good news is, my mind ain’t all broken.” Fiddleford hugged his banjo and turned to look up at Ford. “Bad news is I knows it ‘cause I still got stage fright.”
Stan scoffed. “Stage fright? C’mon it’s one kid and a couple o’ city slickers who would probably think you playing three wrong notes and spitting is ‘authentic’.”
“Stanley, be supportive.”
“I am! Look I’ve been at this job forever. All you gotta do is smile and if something goes wrong, you blame a ghost or something. They eat that up.”
Fiddleford shook his head. “But this is music. If’n I mess up music, ‘specially somethin’ they know. Music is real special to people, I can’t spoil it.”
Ford knelt down next to Fiddleford’s chair. “You don’t have to play that song Fiddleford. You don’t have to play at all.”
Fiddleford looked anxiously between Ford and the family. It seemed the little boy had finally gotten his mother’s attention and was excitedly pointing toward the porch.
“I…” Fiddleford shook his head. “I can’t let the little ‘uns down. ‘Specially not those ones.” As he said this, he gestured with his chin towards the other end of the porch where Dipper and Mabel sat bickering in lawn chairs. Mabel had returned from her raccoon chase covered in twigs and holding a surprisingly docile raccoon. Dipper was leaning away from the pair while trying to convince Mabel to stop feeding it gummy worms before it developed a taste for human food and tried breaking into the Shack.
Ford's gaze drifted to the twins. "Alright," he relented. "But you still don't have to play Mabel's song."
Fiddleford bowed his head.
"Yet!" Ford offered. "Not yet. She'll understand I'm sure."
Fiddleford frowned, looking unconvinced.
"Of course not yet!" Stan interjected. "You can't go playing the grand finale right out of the gate! You gotta warm 'em up first, keep 'em wanting more." Stan slapped his hand on Fiddleford's back. "If you give 'em what they want right away, they won't come back! Hold that one off until tomorrow or...uh...next week. Tease it or something."
Stan had started rubbing the back of his neck with his other hand as he spoke, a tell Ford was quick to recognize. It was the same one he did when he would "begrudgingly" let Mabel choose the movie for movie night or let Dipper rope him into another game of Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons. Covering the most vulnerable part of his body while he let his emotions go soft.
Fiddleford seemed to perk up at Stan's words.
"Well," Fiddleford offered. "I do know some proper jugband music. Only, it don't have the same ring to it without a jug."
"We've got a jug!" Mabel cheered from the other side of the porch. It seemed the raccoon argument had reached enough of a truce that the twins were once again paying attention to the concert. "I used to keep pond water in it, it's in the kitchen!" She hopped off of her chair, lugging the racoon along with her like it was a rather expensive lap cat.
Dipper followed her. "Why did you have a jug of pond water?"
"Because, dummy, if I met a frog prince he would need something in the shack to remind him of home."
"Aren't you supposed to turn him into a person though?"
Whatever Mabel's retort was to be was cut off by the door swinging shut.
"There ya go," Stan grumbled. "You're getting your jug. Just in time too." He gestured toward the SUV. The mother was walking toward the Shack, one hand holding the baby, the other gripping tightly to the little boy's hand. The little boy gripped a few dollars in his fist, eyes alight with excitement.
Fiddleford looked frantic. "I can't sing and play the jug at the same time!" He gripped at his hat, pulling it down over his ears.
Ford sighed. "Then don't play the jug."
"It won't be the same!" Fiddleford shook his head. "A jugband without a jug that's...that's like a body with no heartbeat!"
The door swung open and Mabel emerged with an old ceramic jug.
"Here it is!" she exclaimed. "And it only sort of smells like pond scum."
"I don't think that will be necessary," Ford smiled gently. "It seems Fiddleford can't play both simultaneously."
Mabel frowned. "But it's a jugband. It's in the name!"
"How about we wait another day," Ford offered, patting Fiddleford awkwardly on the back. "Maybe someone in town will join you."
"Oh for Pete's sake, give it to me." Stan snatched the jug out Mabel's hand, sniffing at the top and giving a grimace.
Fiddleford stopped pulling at his hat, peeking out from under the brim. "You'll play?"
Stan grunted. "I'm not missing out on good money just because you have a case of the heebie jeebies. Besides, how hard can it be? It's like blowing on the top of a beer...er...I mean soda bottle."
Dipper crossed his arms. "Grunkle Stan, we know what beer is."
"Not from me you don't."
Mabel squealed. "It's happening! Grunkle Stan is learning an instrument!"
"It's not an instrument, Pumpkin. It's dishware."
"It's a scrapbookortunity!"
Mabel dashed into the house once more, leaving Dipper to grin at their Grunkle Stan.
The family was only a few yards away now. Fiddleford looked between Stan, Ford, and Dipper, and straightened up in his seat.
"Alright. Alright!" He clapped his hands together. "Stanley, you get down here with me, otherwise your feet are gonna get mighty sore from standing." He yanked at Stanley's hand until he sat beside the rocking chair with a grumble.
"Now when I tap my foot," Fiddleford instructed. "You blow on the jug. One short note at a time." Fiddleford tapped his foot in demonstration. "You got that?"
Stanley rolled his eyes. "Gee, I don't know. Seems pretty complicated for the guy without a PhD."
Mabel burst through the door, camera clutched in her hands. "Got it!"
"Excuse me?"
The little boy stood on the porch, approaching the banjo case with far more trepidation than before. Eyes darting between the assembly, he dropped a few dollars in the case.
"Is this enough to play a song?"
Fiddleford didn't bother looking at the money. He turned his gaze to Stanley, who shrugged and raised the jug to his lips.
Fiddleford grinned. "You know ‘Boodle Am Shake’?"
The little boy shook his head.
"Well you're about to!" And with that he was off.
By Fiddleford's standards, it wasn't a horribly complicated tune. Ford had heard him pluck out more complex riffs while waiting for the coffee pot in their dorm room to brew. But Fiddleford was smiling. His shoulders had dropped from around his ears, and he was nodding at the little boy to tap his feet along with him. Ford hid his smile behind his hands as he watched Stanley, eyes focused on Fiddleford's bare foot with as much attention as one would give to diffusing a bomb. Next to him, Mabel was snapping pictures of the pair. Dipper stood on his other side, wearing the small smile he tended to get when feeling introspective. Ford laid his hand on Dipper's shoulder, and Dipper leaned into the touch.
The mother was smiling at her little boy, her baby having finally stopped fussing. Maybe it wasn't the grand attraction Mabel had planned, but Ford thought it was worth far more than those few dollars anyway. Nothing could be worth more than his family standing around him, his closest friend singing again.
I know this song, it don't mean a doggone thing. Just do that good old Charleston swing. When you sing...
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acrobattack · 7 months ago
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Like, YEAH, girlfriend!
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calmlb · 8 months ago
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hc that Dazai made a point of calling Chuuya small when they met because Dazai was used to being the small one.
like, finally there was someone shorter than him. because let’s be real, Dazai was barely taller than Chuuya in Fifteen.
i think people forget how small Dazai was too— not just in height, but also in weight. He was underweight in Dark Era, but in Fifteen & even at present he's barely within the healthy weight range for his height. he was constantly described as a twig in Fifteen, and almost every time he's introduced in the light novels he's called lanky, slender, etc.
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